Today’s workplace is full of challenges, the least of which is the variety of people with whom one comes into contact. Some of the more difficult personality types can make a place of business seem more like a jungle than an office. By recognizing these unique personalities one can navigate through the workplace and learn to graciously tolerate, if not appreciate, these characters. There are several archetypes that show up time and time again on the job. These include the schoolyard bully, the practical joker, the office flirt, the golden one and the gossip.
First and most intimidating is the bully, like the schoolyard counterpart, the office bully misuses power to get others to see things his or her way. The bully’s leverage could be his or her title, tenure, or lousy temper. Whichever the weapon, the goal is to get his or her way. The bully is not afraid to make a scene, and will throw a tantrum, yell in your face, stomp the floor or pound the desk. The special strategy to deal with the bully is to not sink to that level or shrink in fright. If you are in a meeting with such a person and their behavior escalates, keep your voice and breathing even and maintain eye contact. Excuse yourself while leaving them with a written copy of your idea, proposal or contribution to the project and say you will check back at a “later time”. This gives the bully no one to yell at; therefore the bully’s head of steam gains no momentum. The bully is looking for a reaction, take that out of the equation and they are left like a helpless child. Plan as much contact with the bully via written correspondence, preferably that which will go through a third party to avoid scathing memos addressed to you personally. If you pull his or her name in the office “Secret Santa” drawing, gift ideas could be something to help him work out some of aggression physically, which could include suction cup dart board, foam basketball set, or kick boxing lessons.
The practical joker is next on the intolerability scale. This is the co-worker who toilet papers your cubicle or sends a “fake” memo that there will be a big layoff. Look for Xerox copies of his or her butt circulating after the company Christmas party. This employee does not mind humiliating his or her self and others and can’t understand why you wouldn’t want a gorilla stripper in the boardroom on your birthday. Best strategy is to keep the joker at arms length, be neither friend nor foe, as association as the former brands you a fool and as the latter, a sour puss. Best Secret Santa gift: A loud, crazy tie or plastic vomit.
Next up is the office flirt, the man or woman who thinks each day in the office is an audition for “Love Connection”. Could be single or married (don’t let the picture of the wife and kiddies on the desk fool you). Tries to create an atmosphere of seduction with dress, words and gestures. Loves working late or one- on -one, and may suggest working out of the office setting. Motives can be as simple as loneliness or as calculated as moving up the latter without paying dues. Whichever the reason for the sexy act, do not let that person’s behavior put you in an uncomfortable position. Over the years, there has been increased awareness of sexual harassment in the workplace, however the lines still remain gray. The bottom line is if it makes one of the parties uncomfortable, its inappropriate. Steer clear of any office fling with this person, and do not socialize with him or her outside of the office, except in a group setting. Best Secret Santa gift to choose: A plain desk calendar or day planner. Nothing personal.
The personality type that is one of the most difficult to deal with is the office “Golden Boy or Girl”. The one who gets special favors for some reason. May or not be related to someone. Not only doesn’t have to follow the rules, but does so in such an obvious way as to invite resentment and envy. This person gets double the praise for half the work and will enjoy the best perks the office has to offer while you may have to beg for paper clips. Best strategy is to not make this person a focal point or else much of your day will consist of walking around feeling short- changed, which is a waste of time and energy. Make a gratitude list and feel lucky that you are judged and have succeeded on your own merits. Secret Santa gift idea: Anything at the two for one sale and keep the better item (to assuage your pique).
The most seemingly harmless but most common character at work is the office gossip. This person has loves to “dish the dirt”. Everyone is human and it is tempting to saddle up to this person, as they seem to have the inside track to all the office news. But as in the fairy tale “The Snow Queen” the view through this characters eyes is often skewed and negative. If you find you are the subject of a rumor started or carried by this person, confront them confidently but gently in front of third party or group and tell them that they have been misinformed about something about you and you would appreciate their not spreading this story any further. The gossip only functions well behind people’s backs, bring the behavior into the light and their power disappears like a vampire out in the sunlight.
Best Secret Santa gift: A self-help book (pick any one that deals with self esteem issues)
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